I have Angels all around me.
For those of you who don't know things have been a little rough at the Tolboe home. About 3 weeks ago we had to spend the night in the ER because I was having some bleeding and cramping. At the end of a long night while Christian was holding my hand the ultrasound tech told us that our baby did not have a heartbeat. It only measured 7 weeks and I was counting my 10th week. They don't know what happened and I don't think we will ever know until we will be able to meet with that sweet spirit again. I have become stronger from this experience and I am thankful for the Plan of Salvation that our Savior has given to us, for me to understand His plan for us.
We do suspect that when I was in the hospital with my gall bladder attacks and my pancreas my body was under a lot of stress and that could have caused something to go wrong with the development of the baby.
I was so worried how Brooklyn was going to take the news. She is such a sensitive girl and I didn't want her to not understand how things like this can happen. Thanks to a wonderful husband who knew just what to say she was a light of hope for us when we needed it the most. I hope Christian wont mind me sharing the conversation he had with Brooklyn about the miscarriage.
Christian: You know sometimes when we plant a seed in the ground it doesn't always grow and then we don't see it.
Christian: Well, Mommy's baby was like a seed growing in her belly and it stopped growing and so it had to go back to Heaven to be with Heavenly Father.
Christian: (hugging Brooklyn) so there is not a baby in Mommy's tummy anymore, But we are going to get Mom all better and see if Heavenly Father will give us another baby in her tummy.
Later during prayers, it was Brooklyn's turn to pray and she prayed that the Baby would make it safe to Heaven. The sweet spirit of a child!I have been blessed with so much, especially wonderful friends who have stepped in without being asked to help me when I needed it the most. Being so far from family is really hard when you have two kids and a husband in school. So I just wanted to thank those wonderful people who have been there for our family these past few months. I couldn't have done it without you. I love you all and hope that I will be able there for you when you need someone.
After this loss Christian and I had to reevaluate our plans for our family and future, especially because right after this trial we found out where he will be going for his core (four month rotation in October 2009)... Detroit!!! Yes Detroit will be Christian's home and possibly mine and the kids next year. All I have to say is BUR..R..R..R..R..R..R Our plans will solidify when we find out in about a month where he will be from June-September.
By-the-way I was able to get my Gall Bladder out last Tuesday because of the circumstances, and that has been a real pain. Literally. I have been in a lot of pain and I am not healing as fast as I would like or as my kids would like. As I have said before, Mom's do not get a sick day. But I have had a lot of help from my wonderful husband and my amazing friends. Love YA
At the end of this long story I have left you some pictures to laugh at.
Yes that is clean underwear...
Yes that is clean underwear...
Mom and daughter looking beautiful!!!